Bonaduces in Belize

After a life changing snorkeling adventure earlier this year in Hawaii, I set my sights on top-notch snorkel locations. This is how we ended up spending a week on Caye Caulker, a tiny island off the mainland in Belize, Central America.

Getting there was more of an adventure than I’d bargained for

To get to Caye Caulker, one must either fly in a terrifyingly small plane and land on a short airstrip that in recent years was reported to have severe deterioration or take a water taxi. Seemed like a no-brainer. I was expecting a 45 minute pleasure cruise. In reality it was the water version of Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride. Sitting in front was a rookie mistake where the ferry was slap, slap, slapping the water for 20 miles into the Caribbean Sea. Without realizing it, we had entered the hydroplane races. It was not a glamorous entry.

A change of pace from our usual travels

Caye Caulker is a rustic, shabby-beach-chic, backpackers paradise. This is all code for no 5 star hotels. I found the best digs Airbnb had on offer, a third floor walk up called The Dive House, located above a dive shop with beautiful views and close proximity to restaurants. 

The lay of the land

Composed of limestone and coral, the island is a quaint little number at about 5 miles long and less than one mile wide. There are no cars, but golf carts are everywhere. We decided to rent one to get our bearings. A Belizean dollar is worth 50¢ American, a set rate. It was $25 USD to cruise around for 2 hours and when we returned late, they didn’t care. It’s a bumpy ride on unpaved roads, but we learned our way around quickly. 

Chill is the perfect word to describe it all. The vibe is super low key, nothing is mass produced. There’s no Starbucks, no Señor Frog’s. Friendly cats and dogs have the run of the place. Most sport collars and have owners but spend their time mingling and looking for snacks. We befriended a sweet one-eyed cat who greeted us every morning at our front door.

Not so secret swim spot

In 1961, Hurricane Hattie devastated Caye Caulker and literally split the island in two. Now the channel that is the Split is a well-known spot for day boats, swimmers, and the Lazy Lizard where people drink beer, listen to loud music, and pee in the water. (Come on, I see you with your bucket of beer, not getting out of the water for hours.) It’s also the spot for prodigious snorkeling. We were lucky enough to see a manta ray jump repeatedly, making a loud splash each time it returned to the water. 

We do it island style

Danny and I brought shoes and clothes we planned to destroy and leave behind. This turned out to be a great plan. We experienced a couple of flash rain storms like I’d never seen nor heard before; The kind of storm that wakes you up in the dead of sleep or causes you to trudge to dinner in white play-doh mud, almost wiping out several times on the way. After dinner one night we called a taxi. When I say taxi, I mean a golf cart driven by the friend of a waiter. We asked him to stop at a convenience store on the way back for snacks and asked if he wanted anything, you know like a water or a Red Bull. He asked for a Landshark, a popular beer on the island. A beer. Our driver. We bought him one, he opened it, and drove us home. Island culture is really something else.

Once a watering hole for 17th century pirates

One morning we were approached by a man with a plastic bag filled with live lobsters, asking if we wanted to buy any. Fresh seafood is the staple of Belizean cuisine and is featured in every restaurant. “Restaurant” often means a guy on the sand with a grill and a picnic table. 

Fry jacks are the favored breakfast item, hearty enough for a day out in the sun. It’s fried dough with your choice of filling (the ham, egg, and cheese was our favorite) but open like a giant taco, perfect for the addition of hot sauce. Marie Sharp’s famous hot sauce is on every table, like ketchup at home. (Quite the markup, but it’s available on Amazon.) 

You’re going to need a bigger boat

And the reason we’re here, the snorkeling. We signed up for a private half-day tour via Caveman Tours. Accompanying us were two lovely gentlemen, Daniel and Josè. The excursion included stops at Coral Gardens, part of the world’s 2nd largest barrier reef, South Channel, and Shark Ray Alley, the main event. 

A bonus on this adventure was the tarpon feeding. These guys can grow up to 8 ft long and 300 lbs. We didn’t know these specs before dangling sardines between our fingers. We were met with massive fish aggressively leaping from the water and tearing the treats from our hands. My adrenaline! A local map lists the tarpon feeding site as the only entertainment on the island — Pure vintage Caribbean charm.

We also hung around a sinkhole in hope of catching sight of a manatee. They’re weary of boats, as this is their leading cause of death, but they have to come up for air every 3-5 minutes so we waited him out and managed to get pretty close to one. It totally looked like Eeyore. 

And then came the sharks. Imagine being on the first tourist boat and being told, like, “I swear to god, this is safe.” Daniel told us to “just go ahead and fall right into the sharks.” Lol. This goes against all common sense and instinct. But once I warmed up to the idea, I have to admit the nurse sharks were kind of cute. They’re also known to be one of the most docile animals and unlike the manatees, they welcome the boats. Instead of viewing us as a threat, they hear the engines as a dinner bell. The sharks are not particularly interested in swimming with you but they don’t mind sharing their space. The manta rays though, will swim right up to your legs.

It was unbelizeable.

(Sorry.)

Go Slow

That’s the motto here. There’s no real need to over plan or write out my usual to-the-minute clipboard of fun. Just take it easy and enjoy the Rastafarian culture.